Distance Makes The Heart Grow Somber

by Depressica

supported by
Jess Casebeer
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Jess Casebeer music for when you're alone and it's 1am and you probably need some zoloft and a hug but fuck it headphones and a warm blanket will do Favorite track: Fondly.
Daisy Martinez
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Daisy Martinez Super chill and sweet, a young girl who deserves your support for her talent! <3 Favorite track: Fondly.
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about

I wrote these songs in the middle of a weird transitional period, between graduating college in my hometown and going to graduate school in Seattle (and almost not going to graduate school in Seattle).

credits

released September 1, 2016

All tracks written/performed/recorded by me.

Album artwork by Cliff Fields, who I am very appreciative of from 3000 miles away.

Thank you Chris Pavlov for letting me borrow your guitar.

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

Depressica Seattle, Washington

this is music that I made in my childhood bedroom.

formerly known as jessica mayuga

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Track Name: Seattle
i was thinking about the good day you wished me
i was thinking about your songs on the road
i was devising a plan i could get you to like me
i was startled at how you remind me of home

so i thought of you while up in seattle
and how i think you would laugh if we were caught in the rain
and how i know you would catch me if i tripped in the gravel
you're a new person but the feeling's the same

rain rain go away
come again another day
it's ironic that the sky is gray
but this is where i'm happy

rain rain where'd you go
i miss you more than you could know
it feels like it was years ago
that i last saw you smile
Track Name: Bobby Pins
i didn't mean to meet you but here we are
listening to music in my car
you said you liked this band when you reached out to hold my hand
and you didn't say a word about my scar

you saw the bobby pins on my floor
and you turned around and asked what are these for
much to my surprise you laid down and closed your eyes
but i couldn't stop looking at the door

i should not have said i liked you but i did
and i said you made me feel like a little kid
i know it's a quick end but i think we're better off as friends
someone else can have the winning bid

because the truth is that i know this won't work out
while i'll get used to water you're in a drought
have fun in your desert weather, i'll try and find somebody better
i'm coming home, but on a different route
Track Name: Love Song For My Best Friend
its late at night and youve forgotten
the taste of blood exists form iron
and the only place where iron’s forged
is the last breath of a dying star

so when the time comes that you are grieving
remember the stars in your blood as youre breating
i’d gather the ends of the earth for you
just to say that i tried

i think that our bond is some heavenly sign
that people were meant to have others in mind
i’m thankful for whatever gods plan might be
because he made sure you existed with me
Track Name: Brief Conversations With The Other Side
so i'm running away
i'll be running for miles
and before i get tired or break a sweat
i'll have been gone for a while

are you leaving so soon?
won't you stay for a while?
will you miss me at all through the static?
i can't hear your goodbye

you won't notice i'm gone
you'll have nothing to say
and it might be a year before you ask
"wasn't she gonna stay?"

i will scream to the sky,
"will you answer my prayer?
my knees will bleed into the earth
isn't anyone there?"
Track Name: Nothing Heavier
let me lick the wine off of your lips
there is nothing heavier than this
let me be the stars under your sky
finding comfort in your inner thigh

i am me again for the first time
water washing over both my eyes

but i'm not mourning any death
i am wishing you the best
an allusion to what's left
and who is leaving
Track Name: Fondly
lying sleepless at 5 am
knowing it'll be a while before I see you again
may the sun wake you gently as it puts me to sleep
and while I'm anxiously waiting I hope you have sweet dreams

but don't waste your time on us
since I will be gone in a month
and I hope it's true that you'll think of me too
but my bones, under weight, will be crushed

when I wake up tomorrow I'll be in my bed
i'll avoid conversation of what's lying ahead
may my heart still be beating and my blood still be red
and may a hundred years pass before I am dead

but I won't call you anytime soon
as I'm busy here packing my room
and I know I'll be fine with the passing of time
but I'll always think fondly of you
Track Name: Bruised
i missed you last week and i'm not getting bitter
there something about the way it unfolds
i'm running away to the cold arms of winter
trying to find the comfort it holds

maybe i'm just doing this all wrong
has it been within me all along?

i'm getting tired and i'm getting much older
but i've never been so lost and confused
and i'm still awake at the end of october
breathing and weak i am beaten and bruised

i didn't want any of this
all i wanted was to know i was missed